Is eating ice cream only for dandy men and poofs?

Look at this little hmo. Does he even stand a chance?

Lupa, let's get some

GM ROUNGE...SO DRNK

Had the ale of the old country last night...and had quite a few. What did everyone drink last night? I will drink many John Daly's this weekend, but I didn't find it to pair well with my Butter Chicken, Chili Goat, and Paneer Pakora last night. What did everyone have last night?

bored panda is bored.

But costume party panda knows it's Thursday afternoon. Anyone getting so drnk tonight? I will be. Can we go ahead and make a drink of the week now so that I have something to look forward to? Only one class tomorrow...

Wednesday Roundtable - 8/27

Each morning we all face a choice - pull the sheets up over our heads, stay in bed and wait till it's 100% safe to leave, or get up and confront the myriad threats to our sanity that exist out of our comfortable sleeping quarters. The brief few minutes (or hours, depending on whether you blowstyle your hair Dilla-style) between setting your foot down and stubbing your toe and reaching work late soaked cause you forgot an umbrella are a veritable minefield of anxiety, frustration and violent swearing. Many things can go wrong in these fleeting moments, but some will no doubt cause more irritation than others. From the freezing cold shower (fking plumbing) to the missed subway connection (stupid train operator), from the spent deodorant stick (wtf do people even sweat anymore) to the ipod with only 1% charge left (I swear I just charged it), from rain on your wedding day to a free ride when you are already late, we all face trials and tribulations that make us question whether or not the game is even worth playing. Each of these peeves will naturally affect some more than others, but I can think of one that is probably the most infuriating to all: the vast expenditure of the dry-cleaning-industrial complex in tools and obstacles preventing us from smoothly putting on the very clothes we paid it dearly to clean.

1) Even before you get to the plastic, you have the twist ties that somehow are thinner than the human hair and more susceptible to being tangled. You spend five minutes twisting in one direction, only to realize that you are making the knot tighter. Then you switch direction, only to find that you are somehow still moving in the wrong direction. Eventually you get so frustrated you just try and tear it off, but all this does is remove the paper exterior, making it even harder to untangle.

2) The plastic packaging some dry cleaner's use is a miracle of modern science. No matter how much you try and ball it up to get rid of the crap, the relatively tiny mass of plastic somehow manages to expand and fill approximately 1 million times the volume of any other material. Even if you have only cleaned one shirt, no matter what the plastic will fill up the garbage can in your room immediately, and possibly spill out and fill up the entire room when you are not looking. That's if you are even able to get the plastic off in the first place.

3) The various tags/clips/plastic doodads/paper crap the dry cleaners use to identify your clothing will also clutter up your life and may or may not even be removable. The dry cleaner I currently use affixes one giant red tag and one smaller, more poofy green tag immediately under the red, both affixed to the label in the back right where that bone in your neck makes contact with the shirt. Instead of a simple mechanism to keep things attached, or the more conventional button hole based placement, this dry cleaner goes through great effort to use microscopic, sharp, prickly staples, thus ensuring that you will either only tear off part of the paper or the whole label. I don't want to say this method is equivalent to a vampire squid sucking at the face of humanity, but I imagine getting a vampire squid off the face of humanity would be easier than removing those goddamn staples.

4) I'll put this one simply. What the fck are you doing to my collar stays? Does the dry cleaning process involve something similar to what happen to the terminator at the end of Judgement Day? Why does it always come back looking roughly like an ampersand?

5) My last dry cleaning bill was $200.

What bothers you? :)

It's funny because it IS true

Ted, here's to hoping heaven doesn't have any poorly lit, unpaved roads. Sláinte!

PENGUIN SIGHTING!

The penguin has landed! Look! That's exactly how he walks and says hello! He also showed up within +/- four hours of his interview!

Top Ten!

Best unused name for a professional wrestling finishing move.
Sorry, flipped through the scene in Harley Davidson and the Marlborough Man last night when Big John Studd gets taken out.

Roungetable

Who has a good Roundtable topic? Huevos, I'm looking in your direction...

Good Evening Rounge

Who's still at work?

Wiki Challenge...

Per number 10 in the Top 10, I'm thinking this can be a daily challenge:

Start here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page

Get to these entries:

1. Teabagging

2. Panda Express

Rules:

1. Fewest Number of Steps wins.

2. Must click links only, no cutting/pasting, typing, etc.

3. Record the chain and enter it in the comment.

Top Ten!

Top Ten ways to Waste Time at Work.

HTF?!?!

http://www.theappointment.co.uk/news/?submitted=False&ID=4955

Cig companies are still paying cagillions of dollars to smokers? how is this possible? Amazingly, people this stupid have actually made me have sympathy towards large conglomerates who produce poisons. They just tryin' to make a livin', yo.

Can we profit? As Dilla pointed out, can we make breweries pay for cirrhosis cases? If so, who's taking one for the team? I nominate Lupa.

Earhair/Moostache-Moostache/Earhair

Squawk!!

The panda has been found - now it's time to locate the bird that shat on Queso so violently a few months ago. Could it have been the beast pictured above? Only further investigation will tell.

Squawk!

Changa Back in the Saddle

WTFR?!

I can't bear to see another plate of panda w/ broccoli served...

GM ROUNGE!!

Huevos, how was the crown and peach? All, please report who got so drnk this weekend, and any ensuing stories.

Global Warming gets all the press, but there's another looming disaster:

When Zombies Attack!: Mathematical Modeling of an Outbreak of Zombie Infection

I'm less concerned about the eventual end of the world at the hands of the living dead, as I am at the fact that this was sponsored by grants from NSERC and MITACS, two of Canada's premier science and engineering research councils.

Yes, this is a Panda Insemination.

We all know how those Pandas hate to mate. The camera angle leaves much to speculation though...

GM ROUNGE!!

These pandas just wanted to say good morning to Jerry Casey. What is with all these pandas anyway???

So bred

WTF is everyone doing? Why does Peno hate labels?

Prove to me ur a woman?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2009/aug/19/caster-semenya-gender-verification-test

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2009/aug/19/lehman-brothers-bbc-drama

Found the panda at Nomura Tokyo beer fest, getting shtfaced with obama (representing 'Change')...this is how we roll.

POOF.

LUPA + SQUID = BEDTIME

Everyone head out to your local B&N to get a copy of the first book from newly united childrens writers Lupa and Squid

It's OMELETE DAY mfkrs!

Let's eat

Ow Changa

Just a thought... Thursday = Theme Night

Let our powers combine!!!

Thursday, routing....who is in??

Catch that open?

Someone do something.

Semi-Routting?

I'm thinking we have a rounge dinner and/or routting. We eitehr start off with Indian (TG and Queso order) then get so drnk or we just hit up the Frying Pan and eat/drink there. Thoughts? Which day works for who?

HAPPY INDIA DAY!!!

It's the weekend

Special shoutout to squid, who celebrates his birthday this weekend.

Real Movies/Bad P*rns

My buddy's and I have had this conversation before, going through a hilarious list, but I'd like to open it up to the masses, especially Grimace. What real movie title would be the most unappealing p*rn? After exhausting a list, we came up with the pictured movie (for what it's worth, Selleck's stache was considered and still it was named the #1 worst real movie title).

Please submit your comments.

GM ROUNGE!

SMIF

Bono and Butters kick off their world tour

WTF Runch?????

Jai Hind

GM ROUNGE!!

Today we shall CNG outside of Henge.

SOMBER DAYS

The Bar Gave It To Me

Do you still have it, Grimace? Top Ten Myths about Risky Bar?

10. Once, while hunting grouse, a bear jumped in front of Risky Bar. The bear killed Risky Bar, and he was never seen again.

[side note: squid need to make some extra money? http://www.odesk.com/jobs/Squid-Illustration-for-Blog-Banner_~~42897fabbc3ed7a1?utm_source=Indeed&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=Indeed ]

CnG This Week?

I am proposing the long overdue first CnG (Chill&Grill) of the Summer (think the original occured in the Spring) THIS WEEK!

TG, you're cool with this right? What day works for all?

Grimace, I expect not only an appearance, but also your drink of the week.

Changa will be at least an hour late.

Lupa, try to go easy on the flannel.

Happy Friday, Rounge

Let's get crunk.

Tonight I will be drinking sake (having Japanese cuisine for dinner), beers, and possibly some kind of shots -- Crown and peach has been a favorite lately. You??

Friday Roundtable - Best Animated/Cartoon Spokescreatures

Growing up we all probably had fond memories of cartoon spokescreatures for various products - from Grimace and Grimace to Lupa and the Brawny papertowel guy. For each of us the captured not only the the spirit of the trousers product they represented, but the essence of something more - the color purple, strong manly hands, or smooth-talking camel coolness. But which was the best? Joe Camel is the obvious choice here. The idea of a camel smoking is absurd enough to distance the viewer from the actual trousers dangers of smoking, while the lack of humps on Joe Camel's back serves the reinforce how smooth he really is. Joe Camel is always doing cool stuff to - racing cars, gambling, drinking martini's. Who wouldn't want to rage with him for a while? Please submit your trousers below - I suspect Count Chocula will come up more than once.

****Updated to reflect the inspirational/hmo influence of childhood heroes on grown up Lupa

Does GS have a weather machine??

Non Farm Payroll #, they revised to -250k YESTERDAY...Wonder how that got that #. Suspicious. I can't wait until they have their headquarters block all sunlight from world fi and they have personal air and water crafts to jettison their employees to and from HQ. oh, never mind that E-slice once stalked their hallways.

WE HAVE LIFTOFF!!

Just got an email from urbandictionary.com that says the editors have decided to publish my definition of SMIF. It should appear on the site in the next couple days.