It is true. On Saturday, I left the BC 54-0 blowout mid-game to resume tailgating, but the Bostoncollegenfaghensthal Secret Police wouldn't let me back on Shea Field to continue the festivities. Bumfuzzled, I walked to Mary Ann's, some 3/4 mile from campus.
On the walk back from Mary Ann's around the Reservoir, I may/may not have been veering into the road a little bit. A cab clipped me, spun me around and I fell on my arse. A crowd gathered. The cab didn't so much as stop. A trooper came over and in light of my bleeding and drunkenness, called for a bus. So the ambulance took me to St. E's where I spent the next several hours. They wouldn't let me leave while drunk. My bum is sore and I have a few cuts/scrapes.
Finally at 1am, I put my clothes on, turned the monitors to silent when I took them off, pulled out my IV and started strolling out the door. The nurses could see I was leaving one way or another and I signed some papers and took off. They weren't thrilled I pulled my IV.
In the words of Will Ferrell in Elf, "The yellow ones don't stop."
Nice work, Rick. Although I'm sad to hear that after 11 years, the BC cops are still pointlessly difficult on gameday and St. E's still won't release you drunk. The key would've been getting out of there without the nurses seeing you- and saving the co-pay.
ReplyDeleteGet your mind right, son. I'm a Captain in the Army de los Estados Unidos. Co-pay? We don't need no stinking co-pays. Flashed the ID and walked out. Hasta la never.
ReplyDeleteNOTHING, truly nothing, angers me more than open container laws and anti-tailgating nonsense.
I'm a grown-up. Let me drink and get t-boned by a taxi in peace. Gosh.
a great story made less impactful by your ability to quote Elf on cue...really, Rick? Also, you couldn't choose an appropriate nickname for this blog? At least be Horahan. You're an Army Captain, aren't you guys supposed to read instructions?
ReplyDeleteHow is Ricardo not already assigned?
ReplyDelete